Something... funny

From the upcoming book by Simon Rich, son of Times columnist Frank Rich and president of the Harvard Lampoon.

i used 2 B a typical teenage girl, gossiping with my gal friends on the weekends (I luv U guys!) throwing slumber parties (zzzzzzz!) That was B4 i contracted hepatitis C.

Sometimes i ask myself, "Y? Y has the lord 4saken me? R U there God? Have U 4gotten me?" i'm trying 2 B positive, but it's hard when U know that your death is a 4gone conclusion. It's only a matter of time B4 my D4med liver ceases 2 function 4ever.

My innards R swarming w/ 2morous growths & the pain is excruci8ing. i no longer have any will 2 live. 2morrow i'll B sed8ed 4 the oper8ion. Secretly, i hope i don't come 2.

i've decided 2 stop praying. Y should I? i h8 god. He sh@ on me & i h8 him. All i can do now is w8 4 death.

:(